Monday, October 22, 2012

Mothra's Revenge

There I am, peacefully laying in bed...drifting off to sleep...and I hear it.

The rasping of wispy wings. Closer...closer...CLOSER...

Ram rod straight in bed, in pitch dark I scramble for glasses and my trusty cell phone. Clumsily smashing my glasses on, I toggle the power button and my iPhone lights up all of a foot in front of me.

Wave it to the left. Nothing. Atleast not close enough to see.

Wave it to the right. Just the dresser. But it's there... I HEAR it...

*flutter RASP*flutter RASP*

I jump out if bed and punch the wall in my attempt to hit the switch.

And there it is.

What sort of moth IS it?!? It survived the frantic swatting, the shampoo bottle, and a goddamn DOUSING!

Maybe I WAS battling a zombie in there! It makes me think of those zombie ants and how those fuckers and being brain-controlled by a damn fungus.

So I took a cup, and a piece of cardboard and caught the bugger. There's just no way I'm going to sleep with it in my house yet again. It's a damn immortal moth. It can go haunt some other poor damsel. I need sleep and well shaven pits.

Here's a tip: don't try disposing of something out your front door by hiding behind it because your in panties and a shirt. Granted...I wasn't gonna risk the moth getting out of the cup by leaving it whilst I doned bottoms but I digress.
Hiding behind the door only inhibits you from properly seeing your captive out.

It took 3 times and one split decision to send all modesty to hell and just stand near naked at my front door to get the bugger out.

As one of my readers said: I battled Mothra. And unless that fucker can also key two's staying out.

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